Bury Me Here

I've been pretending to go to work for three weeks. I got fired and I can't bring myself to tell my wife. Every morning I drive to a parking lot and sit there until five.

I read through my partner's phone last night and found messages to someone else. I haven't said a word. I just keep smiling at breakfast like nothing happened.

I've been sober for 214 days but nobody knows I was ever addicted. I celebrate alone every night by just making it through another day without a drink.

I have over forty thousand in credit card debt and I keep buying things to feel something. My family thinks I'm doing well financially. I can barely breathe.

I smile at work. I laugh with friends. I post happy photos. But I haven't felt genuinely happy in over two years and I don't know how to fix it.

My best friend's partner hit on me at their engagement party. I never told her. The wedding is next month and I feel sick every time she talks about it.

I dropped out of college six months ago and I've been faking it ever since. My parents are paying tuition for classes I'm not attending. The guilt is destroying me.

I still write letters to my mom even though she passed away three years ago. I keep them in a shoebox under my bed. It's the only thing that helps.

I cheated on every exam in my final year. Got honors. Got the job. Everyone calls me smart. I feel like a fraud every single day at work.

I borrowed money from a friend to cover rent and spent it gambling instead. Now I owe my landlord and my friend and I can't look either of them in the eye.